I am about to become a superhero. I know you are wondering how this is going to happen. Allow me to elaborate:
I got irradiated yesterday. I got an injection of radiation and inhaled radiation. The doctors were trying to figure out if I had a pulmonary embolism. I did not, for the record.
So...what do you think my superpower will be? I am hoping for invisibility!
Seriously though, it was pretty scary. Especially since Eric wasn't allowed to be back there with me. (He got a sucker and I DIDN'T! WTF is that?)
This year has been strange, medically speaking. I spent a long time without medical insurance, so I am thinking maybe I am getting all these medical issues thrown at me because now I have insurance.
Or, you know, maybe I am meant to be a superhero. Yeah, let's go with that excuse!
I would go for fantastic luck as my super hero power ... that would be fantastic. My super hero name would be "butt face" ... just because it'd really throw off any villains.
ReplyDelete(After I saved whatever city a few times I'd be moved up to Private Butt Face, and so on and so on until that day when I reach Grand Admiral Butt Face.)
This post brought to you by: my newly re-discovered love of saying butt face ... and just in time for the holidays.
Oh, my God. Pulmonary Embolism?????!!!!@@##$ People drop dead of those things every day!! Were you having trouble breathing, or coughing up blood? What did they find, if it wasn't that?
ReplyDeleteWell, I'm glad it wasn't an embolism... why didn't you put the pout on and take Eric's sucker?
ReplyDeleteP.S.
I vote for PMSWoman...
Ohhh I like PSMWoman! I can fire a gun and instead of a bullet a midol would propel out! I like it!
ReplyDeleteOk, this all started a couple of days ago. I had pretty bad chest pain and jaw pain. I have, about once a month, leg pain in the middle of the night. They took blood out of me, and then proceeded to start narrowing down what it could be. I got an EKG (normal) and they irradiated me because they thought the highest probability was blood clots (especially for people my age). Apparently it wasn't. So, they are testing my blood for an enzyme that would indicate a heart attack. But my lungs looked good, and so did my chest Xray, which is good. I am not pregnant, and I am not on any drugs (haha, thanks Mr. Murse, I could have told you that.) and so they released me. They will get back to me if the blood work turned up anything.
ReplyDeleteIn the meantime, I am going to the dentist to get this weird thing that is happening in my mouth (it looks like a vein exploded in my gums...hence why they were SO SURE it was an embolism.) and see what is wrong there.
That was probably WAY MORE than you wanted to know - but there it is!
HAHAHA you need a flying wiener dog as a sidekick.
ReplyDeleteYes! you will be The Amazing Iron Lung!
ReplyDeleteInvisibility isn't all its cracked up to be. Besides what the heck would an extrovert need with invisibility?? Oh, right, you would actually STOP the bad guys in their acts while chickens like me would only play ghostie on them. "Whooo HooooO!! Ebeneeeeeeeezer Scrooooooooge! Whoooo Hooooo! *rattles chains*"
Right?!! I had pretty much the same reaction. That, and knowing that one of the most common manifestations of a heart attack in females is JAW PAIN. We've got her on antibiotics (if Eric picked them up yet) and are seeing her in the dental office on Saturday. I would have made the dentist come in on Wednesday night to start on things, but she already had had enough of a healthcare adventure for one day as it was.
ReplyDeleteI cast my vote for Anti-Bullshit Woman. You powers can be...
ReplyDelete1. The swifter than light backhand,
2. The amazing stare with comic lightening bolts that cuts to the quick in a flash,
3. The preemptive swift kick in the butt,
4. and last but not least, the Super-Duper Dumb Look that imparts instant intelligence to your subject(s).
Oh, I've been ursuped.
ReplyDeleteI totally vote for The Iron Lung.
However, you'd need a side kick to push you around... don't pick anyone in tights (unless they're cute textured tights)
I LIKE IT!
ReplyDeleteOh I have been looking for cute textured tights for weeks, it feels like you read my mind.
ReplyDeleteHere is my application for sidekick: http://www.kohls.com/kohlsStore/womens/sockshosiery/tightsleggings/PRD~501969/Simply+Vera+Vera+Wang+ControlTop+Argyle+Tights.jsp
ReplyDeleteDammit now I want those.
ReplyDelete