Monday, October 5, 2009

Attempted Kidnapping

My friend Hogie lives in Oak Lawn, Illinois. I am only telling you this because that's about 45 miles away from where I live. And in Chicago traffic, that's like 1.5 hours.

I see Hogie walking down the street as I am on the way to the bank. I pull up to a stop sign, roll down my passenger side window and scream in a scratchy voice "HOOOOOGIE GET IN THE CAR NOW! THIS IS A KIDNAPPING!"

The guy, who coincidentally enough isn't Hogie, looks at me like I am insane. He literally jumps back and almost half turns, like he is about to run in the opposite direction.

Then I start to think "What is Hogie doing in the Western Suburbs in the middle of the day?" Uh oh...

Apparently Hogie has a twin that lives in the Western Suburbs. And apparently that twin thinks I am trying to kidnap him. But if you can't make an ass of yourself in front of your friend's Doppelganger, then who can you?

And now, for something completely different:

Your Parents Were Awesome. It's a website that is exactly what it sounds like.

[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="500" caption="Fuckin' A Diane"]Fuckin A Diane[/caption]

3 comments about my weirdness:

  1. I totally read that as 'Your Pants were Awesome' and did not get what I expected from that site. Shame.

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  2. Actually...that would work too. Some of those folks have fashionable pants!

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  3. Ah, I'm English, see, and pants means underwear for me. :( I want to see awesome pants!

    ReplyDelete