Parenting Tips By Blair

I need a t-shirt that says "I am totally blogging this" because of how often I have said that phrase in the past week.

This past weekend, I went to my friend George's birthday part (not the George with the car the texture of a shotgun, though he was also there. I know too many Georges.)  George's family has the best parties. They follow this simple formula: everyone gets together in their backyard and drinks (and possibly blows off fireworks), George's mom makes the best food in the world, then we all hang out in the backyard eating and drinking. Really, you cannot go wrong with that formula.

George's nephew was there, and Blair and I were playing with him. Without further Ado, here's some tips or advice Blair gave to George's nephew, which I am sure George's sister will be thankful her son now knows:

"Oh little buddy, you hands are dirty? Just wipe them on your shirt!"

"Enna, just distract him. Divert his attention! He'll stop being upset if you divert his attention!"

"Enna loves it when you run her down with your power wheels! I'll bet your mom loves it too!"

"Just wipe your nose on your shirt! I do it all the time!"

"When you kick the ball, aim for the other guy's FACE."

"Here's some scissors! Go ahead and run around with them!"

Ok so I totally made up that last one. But let's call a spade a spade, I wouldn't be all that surprised. And it's not that Blair hates kids or anything, it's more like you shouldn't leave your kids alone with him unless you want them returned covered in snot and mud and about to run you down in a power wheels.

Seriously though, George's nephew gave me a hug and a kiss when I left, which made me all wubly and fuzzy inside. Which made me go home and yell at Eric "BABY NOW BABY NOW BABY NOW" which made Eric google vasectomies. All around, I have to say it was a great weekend!